Asking for testimonials isn’t like asking your crush out—but it feels like it
In my first customer-facing role at a startup, I was super anxious about asking for testimonials.
Sure, the customer seemed happy. But asking for your first testimonial is about as bad as asking your crush to be your boyfriend. You know, middle school-style—where you're both painfully awkward and somehow still expected to define a relationship that doesn’t even have dates. (And no, we can't ask our friends to pass notes and meet us by the Coke machines anymore.)
So yeah—there’s a vulnerability to it. And when I started my own business, that feeling didn’t go away. In fact, it got stronger.
I worried that asking my first customers would tank the relationship. I didn’t want to make them uncomfortable. It probably took me a solid year before I even asked for a testimonial—and even then, it was just a short quote. I didn’t want to ask for too much.
But then something changed.
For years, I wrote case studies and collected testimonials on behalf of the companies I worked for. I’d interview customers, shape their stories, and highlight their wins—no problem. But when it came to doing the same thing for my own business? I froze. It felt personal. Vulnerable. Like maybe I was asking for too much. I had to remind myself: this isn’t self-promotion—it’s storytelling. And it’s what I’ve been doing for others all along.
A client said something kind. I asked to share it.
The first time a client gave me gushing feedback on a call, I felt awkward again. How was I supposed to respond without sounding weird? All I could think to say was “thank you,” and then, almost instinctively:
“Would you be OK with me sharing that on my website?”
To my surprise, the answer was an enthusiastic yes.
That was the moment I realized: you can be humble and ask for permission to share. And honestly, your clients often want to celebrate with you. They just don’t know you need the words.
So at some point, I just said: Let’s go for it.
Testimonials are celebrations—not chores
When I got my first real testimonial, I shared it. Then I told other clients they could be featured on my site, too. I framed it as a way to help their peers—because most of my clients remember how hard it was before we started working together, and they don’t want others to have that overwhelmed feeling for too long.
And because I work with great people, I knew they wanted to help. They just needed a little nudge and an easy way to say yes.
The big realization?
This isn’t a favor. It’s a celebration.
You’re not putting a burden on your customers. In fact, it’s your job to do all the heavy lifting—especially if you’re asking for something like a case study. They’re busy. Don’t make them market your business for you. Write the draft. Get their approval. Make it feel fun and flattering. That’s your role.
Let’s break down the different types of feedback
There are so many ways to collect and share customer feedback—and each one has its place depending on the product, stage, and audience.
Here’s a quick breakdown:
📝 Self-serve reviews
Think: LinkedIn recommendations, Google reviews, booking platform ratings
✅ Great for: early-stage businesses, local services, or low-ticket offerings
💡 Tip: Ask early—ideally after a first win or milestone, when energy is high.
You might need to nudge them. Send a direct link, a follow-up email, or even a QR code if you’re in person. People often want to leave a review—they just need a clear path to do it. Make it easy.
💬 Testimonials (text or soundbite)
Think: A short, specific quote pulled from a call, email, or review
✅ Great for: websites, social media, proposals, product pages
💡 Tip: Ask in the moment! “That’s amazing. Would you be OK with me sharing that?”
📹 Video or audio snippets
Think: Zoom clip, voice note, selfie-style video
✅ Great for: social media, reels, landing pages
💡 Tip: Only do this if your client is comfortable—and keep it under 60 seconds. These tend to perform especially well on social platforms where engagement metrics matter.
📚 Case studies
Think: Full story arc with before/during/after and metrics
✅ Great for: B2B, high-ticket, long-term services
💡 Tip: You write it. They approve it. Keep it easy and client-centric.
Want to go deeper? Use value-selling thinking.
If you want to really show transformation, think like a value-seller. Frame the story like this:
Before: What was going wrong? What did the client want?
Why you?: Why did they choose to work with you?
During: What did you actually do together?
After: What changed? What outcomes or milestones can you celebrate?
Don’t wait until the end of the relationship. You can capture shifts at multiple points, especially if there’s a long timeline. I’ve even gone back months later to add an update.
And if your client doesn’t want their name on it? That’s fine, too.
Yes, anonymous testimonials still work
Sometimes your client wants to stay anonymous—and that’s OK. Maybe they need internal approval or their legal team said no. Or maybe they’re just private people.
The key is to keep it specific enough for your audience to relate. That might mean sharing their title, industry, business type, or region. But avoid details that make them too identifiable—like if they’re the only Minot-based pet sunglasses boutique in the U.S. (In that case: just say “pet specialty retailer in the U.S.”)
I usually draft testimonials as if the client is comfortable being named, and then I give them the option to go anonymous. That way, they’re not starting from scratch—and they can control what feels right to them.
The goal is resonance, not exposure.
How I do it now
These days, I flag moments in calls where a client hits a milestone. I let them know I want to celebrate it, too.
If they’re on board (and they usually are), I start thinking about how to shape the story—not just what they said, but what it shows about their growth and our work together.
So when I sit down to draft any kind of testimonial, I think about:
What was true before we started?
What changed as a direct result of our work together?
What’s the outcome we’re celebrating?
Where I can, I gather metrics. Words and numbers are each powerful—but when you have both? That’s next-level golden.
I use the same basic structure every time, so I’m not reinventing the wheel. That makes it easy to get started and keeps the focus on what matters most: the client’s experience.
I mirror their tone, keep it in their voice, and let them tweak anything that doesn’t feel quite right. When I send the draft for approval, I include a quick note that covers these three things:
Please take a look and make sure everything feels accurate and true to your experience.
Feel free to suggest edits or tweak anything that doesn’t quite sound like you.
If you need to run it by anyone else, I’m happy to send over a clean version to make that easy.
That gentle, low-pressure approach almost always gets a quick yes—and it makes the whole process feel collaborative, not transactional.
TL;DR: Testimonials build trust and community
You’re not being annoying. You’re being generous. You’re giving your clients a way to feel proud, reflect on their growth, and help others like them find the right fit.
This is how you grow.
It’s not self-promotion. It’s a signal of transformation. It’s a mutual gift.
And for what it’s worth, over the years I’ve been called a unicorn more times than I can count. It’s not something I take lightly. So when I use a unicorn in my logo, that’s not just a cute illustration. It’s a testimonial. It’s a reminder. And it sets expectations for every future client.
